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In fact, while they hovered in the inky blackness, the two lovers discussed the esoteric ramifications of the color black and what it various meanings meant for mankind throughout the ages.

Despite the fact that they weren?t able to discern the location of the missing Horcrux, Harry suggested that they attempt the ritual again immediately upon returning to his body.

"You just want me to give you another hand-job," Hermione said in a reproachable fashion.

"Yes," he replied with all honestly. He then went on to lecture on the numerous health benefits of an active sex life.



*



A few days later, after the effects of the wit enhancing ritual wore off, Harry and Hermione made their way to their chambers after their lessons had ended for the day. Harry was pleasantly surprised to find Remus waiting for them in the Head Students? common room.

"What?s up, Moony?" he asked as Hermione shut the door.

"I?m sorry to bother you two," Remus said apologetically. "But something rather curious has come up."

"What is it?" asked Hermione.

"Do you believe in reincarnation?" the older wizard asked sincerely.

"I?ve never really given it much thought," Harry said.

"I?ve read some books on the subject," offered Hermione.

"Well, prepare to be amazed," Remus stated and he opened the door leading to Harry and Hermione?s room.

Slowly, little Sirius, Remus? son, came out of the room. The infant didn?t crawl; in fact he walked upright, on two wobbly legs.

"He?s not supposed to do that," Hermione said to Remus. "Sirius is too young to be able to even crawl, much less walk."

"Then I guess I shouldn?t be able to talk either," the infant said in a squeaky voice.

"What the hell is going on?" Harry asked in shock as he stared at the talking infant.

"Harry, Hermione, I?m Sirius," the baby stated.

"Yes, we know that," Hermione said.

"No, not ?Sirius, Remus? son,? I?m Sirius, Remus? old lover and Harry?s godfather," the baby corrected.

"You can?t be able to talk," Hermione balked.

"Wait... Sirius was gay?" Harry asked in disbelief. "I thought he was a ladies? man?"

"No, we only referred to your father in that way," Remus pointed out. "Never once did we mention our sexuality to you, Harry. Not because we weren?t proud, but because we were private."

"Wait, you?re gay?" Harry asked Remus again.

"The proper term is bisexual, but yes, I?m gay," the older wizard answered. "Having a Metamorphmagus as a wife really does have its benefits, especially in the sack."

"Hey, remember me," the baby waved his chubby little arm to get everyone?s attention. "I?m the issue here, not the fact that Remus liked to slob knobs."

"Crude as always," Remus criticized, rolling his eyes in disapproval.

"I could remind a certain someone in this room that he used to particularly enjoy my crude language, especially when that certain someone and I were locked up in dark and cramped broom cupboards, but I won?t," little Sirius commented. "We need to find out how this happened."

"The baby is talking!" Hermione said in shocked disbelief while pointing at Sirius.

"Well, that?s the point. But, I?m not a baby, not really," little Sirius said. "I?m Sirius Black. I went to school with Remus, James, Lily, Wormtail, and Snape. I fought in the first war as a member of the Order of the Phoenix, was betrayed by Wormtail, chucked in Azkaban, escaped, met you, Harry, went on the run, then got locked up in Grimmauld Place, fell through the Veil in the Department of Mysteries. The next thing I know, I?m getting pushed out of my cousin?s womb. How?d this happen?"

"The baby is talking!" Hermione, still in shock, repeated.

"Hermione, I need your brains right now," Remus said and it seemed to draw the brunette witch out of her stupor. "You?re one of the brightest people I know and I need you to figure out what happened."

Clearly bolstered by Remus? compliment, Hermione snapped to attention. "So, he?s Sirius?" she questioned.

"Yes, he has all of Sirius? memories and experiences," Remus summarized. "I don?t know if it was because of that ritual you and Harry tricked us into doing, or the fact that I?m a werewolf and Tonks? is a Metamorphmagus. Or even a combination of different things that caused this."

"Wait, wait," Hermione demanded. "I read some cases of reincarnation. But I have never heard of one where the person has retained all of their memories from their past lives. It?s never happened."

"Well, it happened to me, Hermione," Sirius said.

"But it?s not possible," she countered. "The cases I read stated that sometimes a few vague memories may remain, but nothing like what you?re describing. You must be mistaken. Surely you can?t be Sirius."

A tiny, impish grin appeared on both Remus and the baby, as if they had been expecting Hermione?s comment. With his squeaky voice, little Sirius uttered "I am serious, and don?t call me Shirley."

Harry paused a second before saying "Wait, I?ve heard that before. On the telly I think."

Hermione turned and faced Harry. It was clear by her expression that she was about to ask him what he was talking about when realization suddenly dawned upon her. "Oh, you cheeky bastard!" Hermione cursed at Remus. She pointed an accusatory finger at the older wizard and loudly scolded again, "Cheeky bastard!"

"Shh, you?ll wake the baby," Remus said between peals of laughter.

"Oh, yes, Hermione shouting will wake up the baby, not his father laughing like a baboon," Tonks sarcastically commented as she walked out of Harry and Hermione?s room. Bundled in the pink haired witch?s arms was a smiling baby Sirius.

Harry?s eyes darted between the two copies of baby-Sirius. He asked, pointing to the baby in Tonks? arms "If that?s Sirius, then who?s that?" and pointed at the one standing next to Remus.

"That?s Courtney, under polyjuice," informed a still laughing Remus. "She begged to be part of a prank against the two of you. How could we refuse?"

"Can I sit down now?" Courtney said in the baby?s squeaky voice. "I haven?t any bloody kneecaps thanks to being an infant, and it hurts to stand."

As the polyjuiced Auror plopped down on the ground, Harry shot a disbelieving look at Remus. "You brewed polyjuice, which takes a month to do, just to pull one of the oldest and most clich?jokes in the world?"

"Yes!" cheered Remus.

Obviously encouraged by his father?s laughter, the real Sirius began to chuckle. Well, actually, he made more of gurgling and spitting sounds, but you could tell that he was trying to laugh along with his dad. The cute sounds that the real baby-Sirius was making lightened Harry?s and Hermione?s moods.

"I can?t believe you went through all the trouble of brewing polyjuice just so you can prank us with the ?Sirius-serious? joke," Hermione guffawed.

"If it isn?t broken, don?t fix it," Remus said proudly.

"What I don?t get is the whole gay thing?" asked Harry.

"Adding elements of the truth in a prank always heightens the realism of it," Remus responded.

"Wait, you really are gay?" Hermione asked, taken back slightly.

"As I told you before, I?m bisexual," corrected Remus.

"Not before you met me, you weren?t," Tonks interjected. "You only liked blokes until I came along."

"So you and Sirius were a couple?" Harry asked, ashamed he hadn?t realized.

"Yes, we were," Remus said with a pleasant smile. "We were lovers but we broke up over a tiff we had shortly before Wormtail betrayed us all. Then we reconnected after the year I taught at Hogwarts. And we reconnected several hundred times while he was locked up in Grimmauld Place."

Harry experienced a moment of happiness. He realized that he was happy with the thought that at least his godfather had some comfort before he died.

"So that comment about Tonks? metamorphmagus abilities being a benefit was true?" Hermione asked tentatively.

"Yes, Hermione. Not only can I change my appearance, I can change my plumbing too," Tonks said with a smile. The pink haired witch walked up to Hermione and confided; "You gain a whole new appreciation for how much blokes love blow-jobs when you can grow a willy and have it sucked on."

"Oh," uttered Hermione as she blushed a deep ruby red.

"I don?t mean to be a pest, but the polyjuice is about to wear off," Courtney said. "And seeing how I?m only wearing a nappy, I?ll be pretty much naked. Now, I know how kinky Hermione and Harry are, but I don?t want to give them a show."

"Alright, we?d better leave then," Remus said.

After saying their goodbyes, Harry and Hermione were left alone.

"So, what should we do now?" Harry asked. He was hoping Hermione would ask for suggestions to which he?d offer "How about you bend over the desk..." but unfortunately, Hermione stated;

"I have to head to the Library and study." She scooped up some parchment and quills. "Professor McGonagall offered me some extra credit and I?m taking her up on it."

"But, your grade is around one hundred and eighty percent already. Why do you need extra credit?" complained Harry.

"It never hurts to get on Professor McGonagall?s good side," Hermione stated.

"Her good side? Merlin, Hermione, McGonagall loves you so much right now I?d bet she has you in her will."

"Maybe you should learn from my example," Hermione challenged. "You could always boost your marks up a bit. How about you join me and we both can get some extra credit?"

"No," he said automatically. "I?ve been reading and studying all day long. It?s time for a break."

"Fine, it?s your loss," Hermione said and made her way out of the room.

Harry grumbled. He was looking forward to making love with Hermione. So much so that ?Harry, Jr.? was stirring from his slumber. The organ was slowly risingand asked where Hermione was. For a moment, Harry considered taking the issue in hand ? literally ? and alleviate himself. But he had a girlfriend now and therefore he shouldn?t have to do this solo anymore. Grumpily, Harry flopped down on the couch.

A loose piece of parchment sticking out of one of Harry?s books on Quidditch caught his eye. He remembered that he had written down something and placed in a book back when he was under the effects of the Wit Enhancing ritual, but like all things he learned or thought during that time, Harry had only fuzzy recollections. Curious as to what he had written, Harry reached over and pulled the paper out of the book. It was a note, in his hand, addressed to himself. It read;

"Dear Harry,

Since you cannot remember things that occurred clearly, I have written this note.

I had a wonderful idea for a charm, and thanks to the boosted intelligence I received, I created it. I have not told Hermione about this spell because I want it to be a surprise.

It is called Loninquitas Amorus. I won?t go into detail how I created or how it works because I know how feeble your mind is..."

Harry paused in his reading. Had he just insulted his own intelligence? As if he had somehow predicted this question back when he wrote the note, the next line stated;

"Yes, I just insulted your intelligence, get over it.

Now back to the charm; the name Loninquitas Amorus literally means ?Distance Love.? Basically, with this spell, you will be able to pleasure Hermione from a distance. There is no physical contact, penetration, or liquid exchange. Hermione will only experience sensations and feelings. Just purse your lips in a kiss and imagine that you are kissing her and Hermione will have the sensation of actually being kissed. The same applies for foreplay; if you move your fingers about while focusing on Hermione?s ?flower? she?ll get the sensation of being stimulated. Same tactics apply to oral sex; work your tongue while pretending to eat her out and she?ll get the sensation.

Sex is even simpler than anything else. The technique you?ll need to perform this part of the charm is something you?ve been practicing for years; masturbation. While you?re wanking yourself, imagine that Hermione is wrapped around your organ instead of your hand.

The incantation is Loninquitas Amorus if you haven?t figured that out already. The necessary wand movements and spell intents are fully detailed on the second sheet of parchment.

Yours... or rather ?me?s,?

Harry."

A nasty smile stretched across Harry?s face. He got up from the couch and fetched his Invisibility Cloak and made his way to the Library. He reckoned it was high-time to test out this new charm.

Once he was close to the Library, Harry slipped into a classroom. There, he cast a Silencing Charm around himself, jotted down a quick note, and tossed the Invisibility Cloak over his body. With the combination of Cloak and the Silencing Charm, no one would be able to see or hear Harry as he performed his new charm on Hermione. Well except for Moody?s Magical Eye, and he wasn?t anywhere near the library, so it?s the same thing.

Walking into the Library, Harry noted that it was rather crowded. A group of fifth year Slytherins was in the Divination section, while two sixth year Ravenclaws were browsing Ancient Runes. And located next to the table where Hermione was doing some light reading (only four books at the moment) was nearly a dozen second years from Gryffindor and Hufflepuff, huddled around a large tome. Pince, the Librarian, was scuttling from group to group, making sure no one was up to any shenanigans.

Silently, Harry slinked up to Hermione and placed the note he had just written on the book she was reading. When he pulled his hand away, it must?ve looked like the note popped into existence to Hermione. Before reading the scrap of paper, Hermione looked around, trying to find Harry, obviously knowing that he was hiding under his Cloak. Giving up on trying to find her lover, Hermione read the note.

"I created a new charm and I?m going to test it out. Just try and remain quiet.

Love,

H."

Hermione eyes narrowed in question as Harry took his place a few feet away from her. Whether she was going to ask what type of charm it was, why would she have to try to be quiet, or how on earth Harry was able to create a charm didn?t matter. Under his Cloak, Harry waved his wand in the proscribed manner and incanted "Loninquitas Amorus."

Harry pursed his lips and imagined pressing them to Hermione?s. He pretended to take in her scent. He saw his girlfriends eyes widened in surprise. She reached up and touched her lips, clearly wondering why it felt like she was being kissed. Harry parted his lips and slid his tongue out, remembering what it felt like to have his tongue roll around Hermione?s mouth. A fetching blush grew on Hermione?s cheeks.

Satisfied that the charm was working so far, Harry decided to progress further. He imagined trailing kisses down Hermione chin, neck, and to her breasts. The brunette witch gave a startled little jump when Harry mimed tweaking her nipples. He magically worked on her breasts for some time, licking, suckling, tweaking, and caressing air. Hermione fidgeted slightly as the sensation of having Harry kiss and fondle her body overcame her.

Smiling, Harry moved onto the next part of his plan. He held his hand in front of his face, extended his fore and middle finger, spreading them out in a "v" and began to lick the space between his fingers. Hermione sat bolt straight in her chair as she felt Harry?s tongue on her nether lips. Eyes bulging and darting in every direction, the witch was clearly worried that someone would notice her predicament. And knowing how kinky his witch was, Harry was positive that the threat of discovery was turning Hermione on even more.

Tiny beads of sweat blossomed on Hermione?s brow. Harry assumed that she must?ve been practically flowing at that time. But, he wanted more out of her. Tapping into his love core, Harry activated his parseltongue ability.

"That?s cheating!" Hermione muttered under her breath. Almost instantaneously, she began to gyrate her hips, grinding her bum and other bits into her seat. "Cheating! Unfair! Cheating!" she chanted in a soft voice.

A short while later, Hermione began to tremble. Harry knew that she wanted to cry out in ecstasy but she was forcing it back. Her mouth opened and her lips formed a tight "o." The witch?s eyelids were half closed. Harry realized that his lover was about to have one hell of a climax. He guessed that it must?ve been the combination of his parsletongue magic, the threat of being found out, and books ? which were a turn on for Hermione ? that was eliciting such a response from her.

Suddenly, Hermione gripped the edge of the table and stomped her feet down. Seemingly involuntarily, her bottom rose up off of the seat two or three inches. The witch let out a long, shuttering "o-o-oh!" before slowly lowering herself back onto the chair.

While she caught her breath, Hermione looked over at the group of second years just a few feet away. Thankfully, none of them had seemed to have noticed her actions. While Hermione was attempting to regain her composure, Harry pulled a very eager ?Harry, Jr.? out of his trousers. The raven haired wizard spat a large amount of saliva onto his palm and spread it over his organ. He spat once more and remembered the actual sensation of what it felt like to make love to Hermione. The wizard gripped his "wand" and slowly stroked himself.

Hermione?s eyes shot open, wider than they ever had before. It looked like her eyes were threatening to leap out of her skull and roll across the table.

"Oh, my," she muttered softly.

Inch by inch, Harry slowly moved his hand down his shaft. Then, just as slowly, he slid his hand back up. He repeated this twice more and Hermione?s hands gripped the table, her feet stomped the ground, and her lips formed an "o" once again. Harry marveled at Hermione?s reaction, she was already approaching another orgasm. Apparently, his new spell was working wonderfully.

Harry continued to masturbate for several minutes. During this time Hermione had no less than three orgasms, each one threatening her resolve not to cry out passionately. She had sweated so much that her hair clung to her face, which was glowing red.

"Miss Granger, are you well?" Madame Pince asked.

Harry had been so intent on Hermione that he had not seen the Librarian walk up to her table.

"YES!" Hermione said a little too vehemently.

Harry wanted to stop, but he was so damn close that his hand wouldn?t listen. It continued to pump away involuntarily.

"I?m f-f-fine, ma...ma?am," Hermione stuttered. With a touch of horror, Harry could tell that another orgasm was about to hit his lover any second. Thankfully though, Harry was in a similar state. He took comfort knowing that it would soon be over.

"You look ill, girl," Pince pressed.

"O-oh, its n-n-nothing," insisted Hermione rather breathily. "It?s j-just my ah-ah-allergies."

"You should go see Madame Pomfrey," suggested Pince. "She has a number of allergy remedies."

"I?ll do-do-do that," agreed Hermione. Then it was upon her. Harry saw her eyes grow wide in a combination of ecstasy and terror. A very large climax was about to claim her. And judging by the look of fear in her eyes, Harry knew that Hermione wouldn?t be able to stifle any cries that would ensue. Hermione took in a great, deep breath and Harry tensed, waiting for her scream of passion.

"AH-CHOO!" Hermione let out a very loud and very fake sneeze. "AH-CHOO!" she echoed and her feet kicked out. She threw her head back and "sneezed" several times in succession. "AH! AHHH! AH-AH-CHOO! AH-CHOOOOooo! AH-CHOO!" Harry was wincing at Hermione?s utter lack of acting ability. He was honestly surprised that the librarian was buying those clearly fake sneezes.

As his lover continued to hide her screaming orgasm with sneezes, Harry finally joined her in ecstasy. With a grunt, Harry ejaculated.

"My, that was a mighty large one," Pince commented, surprised by the ferocity of Hermione?s sneeze.

"Damn right it was," Hermione muttered in a husky voice. The edges of her lips spiked upwards and her eyes were sparkling in a truly satisfied way.

"Well, get yourself to the Hospital ward straight away," Pince ordered. Harry could tell that the Librarian was less concerned about Hermione?s health than she was about the younger witch getting germs and boogies all over her precious books.

"Let me catch my breath, then I?ll go see Pomfrey," Hermione sighed contentedly.

Now that his task was completed Harry magically cleansed his discharge (he had thought about leaving his mess on the floor but that was too unhygienic) and left.

Humming happily to himself, Harry walked toward the Head Boy and Girl?s room unseen and unheard by anyone. He was satisfied, not only for having created such a useful spell like Loninquitas Amorus but also for making Hermione climax like she had never before.

"Potter?s the best teacher, I tell you," a sixth year Ravenclaw told his friends as Harry passed a small gathering. Curious as to why these kids were talking about him, Harry moved closer so that he could listen in.

"I?ve learned so much from him," another boy added with a grin.

For a moment, Harry had thought they were talking about Dumbledore?s Army, but it didn?t make sense at all. None of these younger wizards were part of that group so they clearly couldn?t be talking about Harry?s lessons in Defense.

"My bird loves what I?ve learned," a third boasted. "She was practically gushing."

"But not as much as Granger gushes, I?d wager," the second chuckled. "She?s an effing hosepipe... but in a good way."

Harry?s blood turned to ice in his veins.

"I can?t wait for my turn to watch it," a fourth said excitedly.

"Why? You don?t even have a girlfriend," the first ridiculed.

"So? That doesn?t mean I can?t enjoy watching the Pensieves."

"It was pretty cool to watch," the second said in a distracted way, like he was reminiscing. "Granger is hot and so damned frisky."

"And besides, look at Creevey," the third pointed out. "He didn?t have a girlfriend, and now thanks to those Pensieves, he?s bagged Patil."

"I really can?t wait until it?s my turn to watch," the fourth repeated.

In total shock, Harry stumbled away from the group of Ravenclaws. As he blindly made his way back to his chambers, his mind was rocked by what he had just heard. The Pensieve Memory he and Hermione had made for Ron was making the rounds at school. People were watching Harry and Hermione being intimate. That was why everyone was acting strangely; Su Li kissing Hermione, that Ravenclaw giving him the thumbs up a few days before, Seamus with Pavarti and Lavender, and Colin with Padma.

Harry didn?t know how he made it into his chambers or when he had taken off his Invisibility Cloak which was draped over a nearby chair. He was looking around the room in a daze and had not noticed Hermione walk in.

"That was a very, very interesting charm," she complimented. "Did you make it while under the effects of the Wit Enhancing ritual?"

"Sure," he uttered, not listening to what she had said.

"It worked wonderfully, but you do have to work on your aim a bit," the brunette witch added with a smile plastered on her face. "You see, when you entered me, you were just a few inches off course."

"Okay," he spoke, skill shocked over the revelation that Ron had passed the Pensieve Memory around and that a good number of his peers had watched him go down on Hermione.

"I?m not angry," Hermione continued, not noticing Harry?s distracted mindset. "I found that I rather liked it. Actually, that?s an understatement. Well, don?t be cross because I know I said I?d never let you take me that way, but I say lets give it a shot right now. It is possible that it was the effects of your love based magic that gave me such a... positive response and the actual physical act of sodomy may be unbearable, but I?m willing to give it a try," she finished with a nervous yet eager twinkle in her eyes."

"Un-huh," Harry said evenly.

"Harry, what is your problem?" she demanded. "I just asked you to bugger me and you?re acting like I killed Hedwig."

Slowly, Harry turned and faced his lover. He tried to find a way to sugarcoat the news, but how does one say "Well, we?re accidental porn-stars, dear." So Harry just blurted it out.

"Remember that Pensieve Memory we made for Ron and Luna?" Harry asked. Hermione nodded, and he continued in a rapid manner, "Well, Ron?s been lending it out."

"To whom?" she asked with an angry expression on her face.

"Um, everyone," he answered.

"Everyone?" she nearly screeched. The anger in her eyes grew in intensity.

"Yes, everyone," he confirmed. "Apparently in turns."

Anger could no longer describe Hermione?s expression and Harry had a difficult time finding a proper word to describe it. But one thing Harry did do was make a mental note to write a touching eulogy for Ron.

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